hair today

'please stop doing that,' my art director urged earlier.
'that', he thought, was picking my cold sore. only problem with that is i don't actually have a cold sore (i do, however, suffer from them from time to time. one year, i actually had 21 of them in a row. look closely and you can see the scars!).
no, i wasn't picking my cold sore, but i was 'bothering' my top lip.
it's microhairs, you see. annoying bristles that, when i am stressed, i try and 'tweeze' with my teeth. sounds ugly and it is! i must stop. i will stop! there, a new year's resolution and it's not even xmas. i'm also not going to drink on Monday, Tuesday or Wednesday for the month of January. of course i could do the 'not drinking in January' nonsense but frankly, who am i kidding and life is too short.
anyway, the whisker biting incident led my managing editor to tell us the story of her driving instructor who suffered from a medically recognised condition whereby she couldn't stop eating her own hair. i know! and not only from her head! apparently no eyebrow, lash or nasal number was safe. and let's not even think about 'downstairs'.
managing ed didn't think to ask her if she suffered from hairballs!
i would have...