eye eye

put my contact lenses in this morning. went to gym. noticed that my left lense was durdy.
big smudge right in the centre, meaning i was seeing the world in slightly soft focus (my left eye is the alpha male of my vision).
get to work, take out my lenses.
still have big smudge right in the centre of my field of vision.
i have smudgy eye! is that a condition, like pink eye? it's not pleasant.
and my eye woes don't stop there.
i once had an examination, at the end of which the optician told me 'apart from a couple of fatty deposits your eyes are in perfect health'.
FATTY DEPOSITS! at the time i was enjoying a particularly tricky relationship with my body, so hearing that as well as a stubborn roll of flab around my midriff i had fatty deposits on my eyes was the icing on a cake i was far too calorie-controlling to eat.
it's a cruel old world.