A mate of mine keeps sending me links to porn sites. these links invariably feature people doing very unseemly things to each other, and, in particularly erm, interesting examples, to themselves. i shan't go into details but isn't it funny how when the more porn you watch, the more bizarre sex seems and the less appealing it is? i say forget castration for the sexual deviants - put them in front of youporn for a couple of hours and they'd soon be begging for an episode of Corrie.
or is that just me.
now, there's no way to link that story to the next one so let's pretend you've clicked through to a whole new story.
i was once wandering the streets of Barcelona, round by the picasso museum, when i suddenly found myself being accosted by a female beggar asking me for money.
first of all she asked me for a coin (to translate literally) while i was outside the bank waiting for my sister. i politely declined her request.
next, she got me while i was sitting on a terrace having a glass of wine. once more, i refused.
finally, as i came out of the shop of the textile museum she came up to me AGAIN and asked me for some money.
me: 'No'.
her: 'Why not?'
which i must say, totally flummoxed me. I genuinely couldn't think of any reason why i, who had plenty of cash, shouldn't give any to this (it has to be said, pushy) woman who had none.
which just goes to prove. if at first you don't succeed, pester, pester and pester again.