tubular hell

apparently, people who work on the Tube call the woman who does the announcements Sonia.
because she gets on ya nerves. geddit 's on ya' nerves.
pu huh (that was the noise my twin sister used to make when she laughed at a joke she didn't understand and has now become family parlance for funny. also for not funny, weirdly)
anyway, Sonya is this week's object of disaffection. you see, i get the Northern Line to work of a morning. it used to be called the misery line because it was so bad compared to all the others, but now that all the others are equally dreadful it has been robbed of than moniker.
so, each morning i get the Northern Line. 'The next train terminates at Morden via Bank' announces Sonya merrily, unaware of her dreadful grasp of English (there is no such place as Morden via Bank) before announcing 'The next train terminates at Paddington via Charing Cross'.
which is plain wrong not just on the grammatical construction but also because the Northern line goes nowhere near Paddington.
Poor old Sonya has got her Kennington mixed up with her Paddington.
I wonder if she has a little teddy bear at home that loves Marmalade and comes from Peru that she calls Kennington.
hey ho