book 'em Danno

viewers of a certain age (actually we're all 'viewers' now. according to the multimedia experts, 'readers' is v v v 20th century. that's not entirely true. my mate Damian Barr is still a reader. in fact he is set to become the world's first Reader in Residence at the Andaz hotel. 'book' him and he will come and read to you in your room! how amazing is that? i wonder if he will pat my bum too, like my nan used to. you can also reserve him for a literary lunch or supper or call him for book advice, which he calls bibliotherapy. he's even holding a 'book-in' at the gaff. find out all about it at guestservices.londonliv@andaz.com or call 020 7618 5061).
anyway, viewers of a certain age might remember Johnny Ball, father of wild child Zoe and erstwhile presenter of Think of a Number. i saw Johnny Ball on the Tube the other day. DOING A SUDOKO! which you just couldn't make up.
so, if you remember Johnny and Think of a Number you may remember a piece of wisdom he once imparted. it went: 'a man with a watch knows the time. a man with two is never sure.'
i was reminded of this yesterday as i made my way from deepest WC2 to bright and oh-so-gay W1. every clock had different variations on a theme. in fact most of them were right, give or take a month or two.
my watch read 6.20pm.
the clock on st martin's in the field read 3.20.
the clock on the swiss centre was stuck at 4.12.
i arrived at my date mystified. was i early? on time? a week and a half late…