oh no!

i interviewed a chef earlier. 'OK, can I ask how old you are?' '37'
'And are you a Thomas or a Tom?' 'Erm, I'm a Nicholas!'
how i laughed.
not quite as much, though as when my friend Tim sent me an email yesterday. he had sent a disc of high-res images of some glitzy jewellery to a repro house to be retouched. 'I've been to our repro house,' he says. 'It makes Prison Break look like a Women's Institute meeting.'
The reason Tim told me this was because he hadn't actually sent a disc of jewellery images to the repro house but a disc of images from his civil partnership, which we celebrated with his lovely partner Alan a few weeks ago.
One of the pictures involved the happy couple crouching down, poking their arxes out as if waiting for a very 'oh vicar' wedding present to be administered – it was actually a preparatory shot for an airborne 'jump' photo. another showed Tim's stubby fingers gently easing a ring onto Alan's middle finger.
i felt a wave of 'oh no' butterflies on his behalf.
and talking of embarrassing, my trainer once took some topless photos of me for a before and after story for his testimonials, which involved me flexing my muscles a la body builder contest.
i put these photos in with a dvd that he had lent me and left it at reception at the gym. and guess what! someone stole the dvd! someone who goes to the same gym as me and who must pxss themself every time they see me!