whatever happened to life? we used to drink tea or, if we were forward thinking Camp coffee, with a splash of milk and sugar (OK, so we didn't keep our own teeth beyond our 20s but we were happy!).
we used to drink beer or, if we were French, wine.
now, we don't have lives anymore. we have lifestyles.
you can't go into a coffee shop and ask for a coffee anymore, you have to ask for a one-shot, decaf, extra dry, straight up cappuccino. fewer than four adjectives and you'll be exposed as a Luddite. or my mum!
you can't go into a greasy spoon anymore (it's a surely only a matter of time before these are rebranded as something with olive oil in the title. greasy is such a dirty word) and ask for a bacon butty. today it's a foccacia (elongated vowels optional and let's not get started on how people now insist on saying pan au chocolat or croissant with French accent start on) drizzled with olive infused olive oil, proscuitto and buffalo mozzarella. lightly toasted.
everything is bespoke. everything is designer (like no one designed stuff before, it just willed itself into being).
it's all style and no life if you ask me
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